Confession

The countdown continues. I am T-minus 72 hours until I start my pre-op diet. And I have a confession to make.

I have been SCARFING DOWN FOOD LIKE THERE IS NO TOMORROW. Honestly, for the past month, I have been eating everything in sight. Ordering appetizers AND desserts. Even alcohol (I don't drink!) All sense of decorum at the table is gone. I dive in, head first, coming up for air only when necessary. I've been having a finger-lickin' good time.

For the past thirty years, so much of my life has revolved around food. I wonder how I will cope. I eat when I'm happy, sad, and indifferent. I eat when hungry, not hungry, I'll even finish a plate of cookies AFTER I'm stuffed. I eat when I'm alone, with a friend, and in large groups.

I will miss my friend, Food. She has seen me through the best and the worst of times. She travels with me, goes on every vacation, and never misses a birthday or holiday. She has never stood me up. She comes to every party, baby shower, Bat Mitzvah, wedding, and funeral with me. She goes to work with me, and then home with me where we curl up with a good book or watch TV. She loves to shop with me, and even helps me with housework.

I had my last Big Mac today. I took my time and enjoyed it. I almost cried. It was like saying good-bye to that boy who you know is no good for you but is just so darn cute. The one your mother and all your friends warned you about.

Thursday night July 5 will be my last day of eating without abandon. Will I chew slowly and enjoy every morsel? Nah, knowing me I'll probably just move my chair up to the buffet and eat straight from the trough.